J. Bowen. The world according to Bob
I knew I wasn’t the easiest person to deal with. I had a defiant, self-
destructive streak that had consistently got me into trouble. It was pretty
obvious that I’d had a childhood that had messed me up. My parents’
divorce and my peripatetic years, flitting between the UK and Australia,
hadn’t exactly been stabilising forces. I’d always tried really hard to fit in
and be popular as a kid, but it had never worked. I’d ended up trying too
hard – and become a misfit and an outcast as a result.
By the time I was an adolescent my behavioural problems had begun. I
was angry and rebellious and fell out with my mother and stepfather. For a
period of around two years, between the ages of 11 and 13, I’d been
constantly in and out of the Princess Margaret Hospital for Children outside
Perth. At one point I’d been diagnosed as either bi-polar or manic
depressive. I can’t remember exactly which it was. They seemed to come
up with a new diagnosis every week. Either way, the upshot was that I was
prescribed various medications, including lithium.
It occurred to me suddenly that this was exactly what had happened to
me. And it struck me that being treated like this must have had a huge
impact on me when I was young. It made me wonder what had come first.
It was a chicken and egg question: had I been given the drugs because I
was acting up? Or did I start acting up because of all the visits to doctors
who convinced me that there must be something wrong with me? Perhaps
most scary of all, what effect did all that medication have on me and my
young personality? As a young kid I’d considered myself quite a happy-go-
lucky character, but since that time I had been what I suppose you’d call
‘troubled’. I’d struggled to fit into society and suffered from depression and
mood swings. Was there a link? I had no idea.
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