Desire and confession

***

My dearest desire and confession
Were to pretend during the absence of action,
To never scatter and gather my thoughts
Because of inevitability of the reflection
And mortifying my tears and sobs.

Once I heard a sever reciting
Happened like storm and the lighting
To never trespass and conceal.
That feeling was fastly driving
My soul to reveal the grievous sin.

With all serenity and awed trepidation
I saw the train arriving to station
Somewhere beside the windmill.
The sorrowful future of our nation
Which nothing about I was promised to feel.

The sacramentary idea slowly impended
At the moment intensifying and fading
Unless within happened a creak.
Unspoken in me was insensibly raging,
Asking for rebirth and for falling in weak.

On the bed someone's apron was lying.
Nobody lived. Nobody was dying.
Broken promises were gone after being emerged.
Before the lectern a desperate crying
Was heard with the voice at the edge.

I hoped my hands held praying
Just kept the grace waving and waving
Before ceasing an absolute cleanse.
But nothing could be possibly weighing
That anguishing and falling dicease.

So I tossed that divine retribution
And again human meanness nor glory confusion
Demonically started to whisper in please.

24.08.2023.