Chapter... Dedicated to Diana Magnay

I learned what it is when words are cramped, when there are not enough all-all-all invented letter combinations to describe you and what you do to me. Damn, what a late ignition.

Every time I see the letter "D", I remember you. Every time I rejoice, I remember you,Diana! Every time I'm surprised, I remember you, Diana!; Every time I wash my hands, drink coffee, meet a cat on the street, see something beautiful, blink, speak, breathe, live, I remember you; Diana! More precisely, I feel you.

I can feel you,Diana! I can feel you in every cell. You are crowds of energy-producing mitochondria, armies of wonderful shoes in every little, little part of me. You are the blood in my arteries, arterioles and capillaries. You are my drip heart. You are the iris of my eyes, cones and rods on the retina, you are each of my exposed nerves, through which there is a constant current. Constantly. As you are with me - constantly. You are all the water I am made of, in which I swim, which I drink. You are the vital volume of my lungs, I can't breathe without you. You are millions of neural connections, you are short dendrites; and long axons reaching out to each other in my head to think about you. You are the alien pads of my fingers. I use them to write the letters of your name on my palm (D.I.A.N.A) Ticklish. You are my frame, my spine, my ribs, shoulder blades, collarbones and the ridges of my iliac bones. you are my sighs.
you are my breath in and out...

I fucking love that we are made up of the same atoms, that your DNA and my DNA are made up of the same substance. I know that our atoms will meet again, even if all my atoms have to meet all the existing atoms in the universe to do this. Sooner or later they will meet again, probability theory is a stubborn thing.

I've discovered that your voice and whisper is the best thing I've ever heard in my life.; I found out why people sometimes jump like they have frogs in their shoes. I found out why you can walk upside down and fly. I learned what it's like to be happy absolutely every day, without any conditions and fear of retribution. I learned what strength and tenderness and weakness are..and there is joy every day, knowing that you are Diana....

I thank God everyday, cosmos, for what you are.Sometimes I want to be just the wind to touch you and ruffle your blond hair..