Я не могу быть к Вам жестоким

Teresa, Contessa Guiccioli was the married lover of Lord Byron *)


               – CCLXXVII –
 
 
Я не могу быть к Вам, как Вы, жестоким.
Всё, что могу – смиренно отойти,
Слагать сюжеты полные любви
В тени у Вас и к Вам всегда далёким.

Ваш голос полон неги и соблазнов,
Невольно проникает чередой
Событий, уводящих за собой
Туда, где с Вами быть небезопасно…
 
Теряю голову, люблю. Но, Боже мой,
Тебе решать, в которой мере нужен
Тобой украденный моей глуши покой.

Пусть с сердцем нет – с фантазиями дружен:
Любовью наделён тобой сюжет,
Где для запретов места просто нет.

               
                четверг, 20 июня 2019 г.

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*) "My dearest Teresa, – I have read this book in your garden; – my love, you were absent, or else I could not have read it. It is a favorite book of yours, and the writer was a friend of mine. You will not understand these English words, and others will not understand them, – which is the reason I have not scrawled them in Italian. But you will recognize the handwriting of him who passionately loves you, and you will divine that, over a book which was yours, he could only think of love. In that word, beautiful in all languages, but most so in yours – Amor mio – is comprised my existence here and hereafter. I feel I exist here, and I fear that I shall exist hereafter, – as to what purpose you will decide; my destiny rests with you, and you are a woman, seventeen years of age, and two out of a convent. I wish that you had stayed there, with all my heart, – or, at least, that I had never met you in your married state. But all this is too late. I love you, and you love me, – at least, you say so, and act as if you did so, which last is a great consolation in all events. But I more than love you, and cannot cease to love you. Think of me, sometimes, when the Alps and the ocean divide us, – but they never will, unless you wish it. – B."