The Palpable Darkness 11. 09. 15

    "Throne of grief ...in a dying essence
Crying beauty ...the fettered aura
Forgotten oceans of hope ...betrayed aphony
Sullen laughter ...in unventured paradise
Forever searching for landscapes serene
Amidst the sunset of age
With... joyous... masquerade...
      this summer's died"
          Anathema. Sunset of Age.

             The Palpable Darkness
   (to the fact of my thirty-fifth birthday)

This autumn the wild fires' fume wraps my shore,
Another historic experiment's o'er
My ground's in the flames as the wind brings the dust
And I feel the steel of my creed turns to rust

My country has changed to the realm of the mad
From hundreds of faces I've no one to add
To my fading life that has too many foes
And what is hereafter still nobody knows

The tale of my love's got the dolorous end
To keep it up I have no cunning to lend
My dear - every time she fell, she had some plea
But now has become the uncrowned expellee

Today I can't carry a stiff upper lip
'Cause nothing remains here but my tearless weep
I must anyhow find the way to survive
Bowed down by the burden of these thirty five...

And through the black stillness I go the old dike
The palpable darkness - I've ne'er seen the like
It whispers: "Such anguish is your only fate
For all Hope conjoins, Death will soon separate"

Too late to repine... yet at heart deep forlorn
I sense my creative resources are gone
No mercy nor truth from this world I expect
I barely may hate it and largely neglect

My road is despair, pain, offence and revenge
The chaos in me not a force can arrange
I'd just ask my homeland to which coasts I clave:
"What coenobite will put the cross on my grave?"

My solace not long ago was in the past
But presently everything is to distrust
The old age's a hangman who tightens his noose -
The stronger you love, the more likely you'll lose

Photo from Internet.