T. Shaov - About Myself

About Myself

I am unsatisfied with myself completely.
My life is muddled, spent for nonsense day by day.
I am doughface, I’m soft and flabby, I’m weak-willed,
Friends say: “Let’s go out!” – and I’m on my way.

I’m very bilious, careless and forgetful,
My mind is labile and my moral is in doubt,
At home also I‘m so effete and fretful,
That I am sad for what my mirror shows out.

I’m not a men, I am a piece of junk emotions,
I’m not too prolix, but I’m babblative, I’d say.
I’m not a coward, but I’m very-very cautious
I can’t say “greedy”, but devoted to the saves.

No, I will always give a crip some spare money,
But if you look at me there will be no confuse:
I cannot nearly be like Mahatma Gandhi,
I even cannot be a bit like Mother Goose.

I am sleeping long and tasteful,
I sleep ‘till the day expire,
In the night I walk like a vampire.

I could be like Voltaire
I could write books, I swear,
But luck of diligence is here.
I could become Chopin,
Make music from everything…
If not so lazy, I’ll be him.

The Bach is stopped; the Plato is unread and dusty,
But I’m watching TV show and drinking wine.
With passion I am doing absolutely nothing
And with disgust I am recalling all my life.

I left my homeland, the business of my study,
Now I’m screaming like a cycling gramophone,
My tiny kids are crying loudly: “daddy, daddy!”
But daddy always is busy or is gone.

At home I’m despot, so stubborn, so tedious
Just from the morning I am poisoning their life
At least, thanks God that I’m having no periods
Imagine so, they’ll be simply forced to die.

I am tight-assed, I’m unrecoverably filthy
I blame myself in whole and blame for every part,
I always feel so existentially guilty
For the Original, First Sin, it’s so hard!

I am drinking, I am smoking,
Watching women, being shocked.
After that I’m back to drink and smoke.

Production plants are smoking,
And I am smoking, well,
I really deeply hate myself.
I am not very pretty,
I am not very smart,
So, why I’m not a Hollywood star?

At any point I can squander any amount
And so a friend of mine said kindly: “I swear,
“With your talents you’re ready for the Senate.
Just go for it, you’re like anybody there. “

But in the Senate all the seats
Are taken and sold out…
Sold out, I believe without a doubt.

What else? Yes, I confess that I am such a rascal.
And now – main thing: a word about you, my love.
I’m saying thanks to you for pulling, like a husky,
All life with me – it’s a continuous sacrifice!

You must be canonized for instant, during living,
For all your suffering, your love and all your work
I'm also going to become a man, just whistle,
Straight from the first of month.
No, better from the fourth.

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