remind

please remind me he isn't mine,
please remind.
i'm coming around the same spot every day.
i hear him say:
no.
it's only the wind in my bleak tattered hair,
it's only the shadow of my broken stare.
i dare him to listen to what i can't say,
i dare him to stay.

i'm keeping my feelings at bay.
no slightest idea
how losing the fear
and letting my soul lead the way
can help me remember
his hand all the way down my spine.
or help me forget?
i'm hoping i'm far from the time
when feelings decline,
when real and dreams intertwine,
the time when i'm finally nearly dead.
i'm hoping that time isn't coming up yet.

remind me i'm helpless
against being selfless,
remind me i'm living the life i deserve.
i'm plucking the nerves
and digging my way with two shadowy fingers
and wiping away all the tears and the mess
that traces behind me each day.
i'm keeping my feelings at bay
and digging the way to the starving forever
where nothing is ever
and i am the one.

i tell you, it's fun.