Только раз бывают в жизни встречи English

Day and night the heart is wrapped in clover,
Day and night sweet faintness fills my head,
Day and night excitement takes me over
From the dreamlike words you said.

Refrain:

Only once our pathways come together,
Only once the fateful thread is torn,
Only once, in gloomy wintry weather,
I so want to love and burn!

Once so bright, the sun is setting gently,
Flowers turn the twilight shade of blue.
Where’s the one I've longed for so intently,
Where’s the one that made my dreams come true?

Refrain:

Only once our pathways come together,
Only once the fateful thread is torn,
Only once, in gloomy wintry weather,
I so want to love and burn!

***

Только раз бывают в жизни встречи

(слова: Павел Герман - музыка: Борис Фомин)

День и ночь роняет сердце ласку,
День и ночь кружится голова,
День и ночь взволнованною сказкой
Мне звучат твои слова.

Припев: Только раз бывают в жизни встречи,             
Только раз судьбою рвется нить,
Только раз в холодный зимний вечер
Мне так хочется любить!

Тает луч забытого заката,
Синевой окутаны цветы.
Где же ты, желанная когда-то,
Где, во мне будившая мечты?

Припев


Рецензии
Женя, а мне понравилось! Вот только одно: Where’s the one I wanted so intently - wanted does not convey the original желанная (like in "Most Wanted":(
Why not try Where's the one I've longed for so intently?- and tenses would be right, too (когда-то).
You can also try I once longed... but this would be less accurate
Regards)

Галина Иззьер   01.08.2013 06:58     Заявить о нарушении
Thank you Galya, yes I also doubt the choice of "wanted" and I only put it there for better ease of singing... But the more I think about it the more I get convinced that being able to sing easily is not yet everything. :) I'll get to it in a few days: more traveling in the meantime!

Евгения Саркисьянц   01.08.2013 09:41   Заявить о нарушении
Done. I've longed for. :) I agree it's much better, and no difficulty when singing.

Евгения Саркисьянц   07.08.2013 18:24   Заявить о нарушении
Happy to be helpful. Thinking through your new Okudzhava... Can you look at the last (top-of the-page)poem, would love to get your opinion on it?

Галина Иззьер   07.08.2013 22:53   Заявить о нарушении
I will probably write a more detailed review later when I can finally type in Russian, but for now I can only tell you that I am smitten by the intensity of feelings that your new poem reveals. The whole bouquet of feelings. I like how the beginning addresses the potential "future" insult; however, the rest of the poem reads as the reaction to the many insults that have already happened in the past. If one of your goals was to make the reader feel what it's like to smile when deeply insulted, I think the mission is accomplished. Very expressive and baring! And some beautiful phrases that catch the eye. Great work!

Евгения Саркисьянц   07.08.2013 23:59   Заявить о нарушении
Thanks, I don't deal well with silences, looks like) And what about the title- it's unfinished, with two posted?

Галина Иззьер   08.08.2013 15:47   Заявить о нарушении
Emily Dickinson ne meshaet?:)

Галина Иззьер   09.08.2013 17:07   Заявить о нарушении
Mne - net. Your title is not the exact copy of hers, and the closeness of concept is even interesting.

Евгения Саркисьянц   09.08.2013 18:00   Заявить о нарушении
My ever-lasting fear of producing something secondary or not entirely mine... Ispravila

Галина Иззьер   09.08.2013 18:01   Заявить о нарушении
На это произведение написаны 3 рецензии, здесь отображается последняя, остальные - в полном списке.