Greedy lying goddamn boss

my goddamn boss, lying and greedy
refusing to pay, holding up my salary
i wish you nothing but scourges, ruin and trouble
i wish your firm blows up like a bubble

shame on you, scumbag, you stooge-y scrooge
i wish your logo turns out already used
by somebody before, and the same with your slogan
i wish urine in your cognac, and concrete in your cocaine

boils in your tongue, herpes on your head and hemorrhoids in your pants
i hope they raise threefold your rent
i wish bribes they pay you stop coming
and your secretary gave you some unknown virus, while cumming

i wish your investments turned out in the red
i wish IRS put a gun to your head
that your woman move in with the trainer
and that your Mercedes got hit by a light rail  tram

i wish your creditors demand their investments back
and that your clients sued you and made you beg
that sirens constantly rang in your office
and that your faucets spewed sewage waters

i wish fire department poured sand in your waiting room
and that power safety fines spelled your doom
i wish sanitation sealed your premises
and that financial authorities froze all your assets

i wish your veep gets scared and resigns
and that your get into a fight with a mafia boss in sauna
that church people denounced your immortality
while tax collector demanded payout of unbearable quantity

i wish intelligence delicately showed their interest
but yet that to everyone it was obvious
i wish the cops stop taking your bribes
and that you learned that your lawyer in Senegal hides

i wish you fell under Selective Service
and that the reporters investigated your humongous assets
i wish your sugar levels shot through the roof
and that Interpol was chasing your hooves

i wish you gain a hundred pounds
and that you became the darling of those human rights bloodhounds
that you turned out wanted for long time, in some other nation
and that they didn't let you out even for a Cyprus vacation

that your cellphone was bugged by three spies at once
and once again, hemorrhoids in your pants
that you jump off the balcony yet don't die
that a bad cop questioning you, made you cry

i wish MPs gobble up your company
all because of that stupid salary
i wish in prison you get subjected to sodomy
cause you're a dark blot on the snow-white body of our economy!


оригинал--Вася Обломов, Начальник-обманщик