Cactus and the Queen

Meditated passively and actively with the medicine plants.
The effects last for the duration of the ceremony but lessons stay for life.
Furthermore, they lead further.
My, personal experience and perceptions have led me to the notion that, blindly, following traditions may not be the answer for me.
Instead, I crave to comprehend and go further.
Not rebelling but following my intuition, which has, already, showed me numerous times that its voice gives me more benefits than standard traditions.
What is a standard, when an Amazonian tradition has multiple sub-traditions and, at times, they are in conflict with each other?
What is a standard when a man/woman raised in the Western society attempts to adopt the world of completely different culture?
The standard, in my opinion, has a double fold.
For an average mind, following is a sager route.
A follower would be lost without guidance.
A strong and searching mind should search but be wise, realizing that tapping into the unknown must be done in steps and small portions in order to provide that safety net in case of an error. Rushing is not the answer.
This Saturday to Sunday would enter the realm of what I call – the Queen and she is potent.
She has that which triggers the 3rd eye, or perhaps it should be called the 1st EYE!
They say she is jealous. Those who follow the tradition.
By the same standards, the same people say God is jealous.
My meditations led me to believe that only humans posses emotional qualities, while the Higher Realm is above that.
Humans, themselves, bring to themselves their reality by their, distorted beliefs and superstitions.
Often, they are jealous.
Would a medicine, a plant be jealous?
I doubt it even if a Higher Consciousness is manifested in it.
The Queen – powerful and overtaking mind.
But why should a mind be overtaken by anything? Is it not the weakness of the mind, which leads to being ridden by the medicine instead of riding it?
So, I search for ways to help my consciousness and mind become stronger.
I need allies, so I search for them by studying and experimenting. Study without experience is mediocre.
The Cactus, powerful and guiding. The one that rhymes with coyote has been kind to me.
I took in moderation but it started slowly opening up the extra perception to me.
It has given me confidence that we can work together. It teaches – I listen.
The more I listen, the more I comprehend and have less desire to talk.
The dreams, they have changed and became more vivid and symbolic.
So what has come to me as a divine guidance or a random combination of thoughts of an inquisitive mind?
The answer that came today was to throw away a shadow of doubt and be strong and faithful.
I would take a risk and change the ceremony in my, own world.
In the morning, I would have my, own ceremony at the nature and take the one which rhymes with coyote.
It would create and unveil its program and world.
At night, I would take the Queen.
They would blend, being guided by my intentions and I would prepare them intensely.
The path leads to the goal.
What would become of the mix I would find out at night.
My spirit does not allow me to doubt and enter the waters of fear.
I sense and belief that both medicines would become synergetic and follow the spirit.
I would share what has become out of the experiment and the reversed sequence.
For now, I believe the 1st would make the 2nd more manageable to me, whereas my goal is to ride and not be ridden.
So far, it has been the most difficult for me, as, once, the 3rd eye or the Pineal gland are stimulated I enter a vibration and waves when on one crest I am submerged into my thoughts and perceptions so deeply that they become my reality and I can’t wake up out of that state, which feels like a lucid dream.
Then, in few to 10 seconds, I enter a different crest of a wave, when can tell myself that I am not my thoughts and something in me is submerged in them but my Higher Self is not it!
That ride becomes a struggle, even though, have been warned not to struggle.
Everything in me attempts to regain control but once out of it falls into fear and pain.
Knowing that I would enter those waves and can’t escape them, I, simply, search for the allies and tools to be ready for the ride but not as a passive passenger but as a driver.
Before I enter the world of dreams tonight, I would ask the Higher Cosmic Consciousness outside and inside of me to receive the help of that cactus so that it can prepare me and show me the path how to meet the Amazonian Queen with love and not fear.
Can’t say for sure if there is blood in me of priests of ancient temples or pyramids or shamans but, do know that it draws me so powerfully and relentlessly that, maybe, meeting me future, I need to go back to my past, so that can learn how to live in the present. To LIVE – not to dwell! Amen!