Amidst the throes of mortal daring,
I know: Black Angel shall one day
Show from the dark to scream, unsparing,
That our salvation has no way.
But, diffident and simple-minded
And as a holy message fair,
White Angel shall appear behind it
To whisper softly: hope is there.
***
В земные страсти вовлеченный,
Я знаю, что из тьмы на свет
Oднажды выйдет ангел черный
И крикнет, что спасенья нет.
Но простодушный и несмелый,
Прекрасный, как благая весть,
Идущий следом ангел белый
Прошепчет, что надежда есть.
Булат Окуджава В земные страсти English
© Copyright: Евгения Саркисьянц, 2011
Свидетельство о публикации №111071605251
Свидетельство о публикации №111071605251
Рецензии
To earthly passions still devoted,
I know the truth - one day I'll see,
How from dark to light will go
Black Angel, crying: vain all be.
But naive and timid, simple- minded,
And beautiful, like a blessing piece,
White Angel follows him, denying:
The hope exists, only believe.
Людмила 31 17.07.2011 08:32 • Заявить о нарушении
I know the truth - one day I'll see,
How from dark to light will go
Black Angel, crying: vain all be.
But naive and timid, simple- minded,
And beautiful, like a blessing piece,
White Angel follows him, denying:
The hope exists, only believe.
Людмила 31 17.07.2011 08:32 • Заявить о нарушении
Ludmila's version is interesting and well-written...I think "timid" is very accurate stilistically....there are several truly beautiful verses. However, when I read Evgeniya's version I catch myself taking it for the original. I think she "gets" the rythm, the tone, the mood. I think "denying" is too strong for the white angel in the original. I think the contrast is better shown by "whispering".
Оксана Понырко 01.08.2011 08:12 Заявить о нарушении
Оксана Понырко 01.08.2011 08:12 Заявить о нарушении
Yes, in my translation there's the lack of contrasts... May be I'm somewhat restless and loud speaking person? so the translation is also "loud"...:)
Людмила 31 01.08.2011 16:16 Заявить о нарушении
Людмила 31 01.08.2011 16:16 Заявить о нарушении