Desolation

for which I should love this illness? ... 
what should I be here when I shouldn't be? 
why I? why me?
everything turns inside
when I think about you
I feel an irresistible aversion
because you do not feel me, but lying
because you hate my beast
I want you to feel my pain
which binds the mind,
choking with tears of impotence
I want you to die in my desolation 
I want you drink a couple cups of coffee
with my loneliness
asking,  what my weather,
and didn't grow up the price
of your unnecessary attention
I have not the strength to say to you: "I hate you"
so I want you to die in my desolation 
I have long loved nobody,
why are you trying to teach me again?
because you can not replace my loneliness
You can not replace me too
You can not replace me what I liked
You can not replace my razor
So I want you to die
in my desolation


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