Какое странное.. чувство

To sit alone in a crowded cafe
and listen to some good old rocknroll,
to stay at the cafe until the waiter starts to take the chairs inside
and turn the lights off..
To be alone in the country
where nobody will ever let you be alone.
Where every man woman and child would ask you
how're ya doin'
as if they really care.
They're free enough to never let you hide.
And may be sure you answer you're all right.

To listen to your footsteps in the dark
sweltering air that never lets the sound
go far away. So you're the only one
on Earth
who hears your footsteps.
Footsteps remind of heartbeat .. or a clock
and anyway - of time. Though it seems time had stopped.
Days full of glaring sunshine
Nights full of dull despair.

To feel but not be able to distinguish
what the hell is the feeling that you feel:
Neither gratitude nor love
A killing shake
that bitterness about losing a friend,
a salty nostalgie brought by the ocean wind,
a mawkish sweetness of being so afraid..
.......

To find the door that's always open, locked.

What an odd feeling
is
to feel
again.