It was a...

It was a walk 
Through ancient park 
In cool and rainy day 
I felt hypnotic call of  drops
That makes me change my way
I’ve lost my way
I’ve lost the path
In dried and soggy grass
I’ve lost a path
I’ve lost the aim
have only emptiness
I thought that death
Is better way
It help me to forget
All those who loved
And who betrayed
And make me a dead set

It was a part 
Of ancient park 
I’d never seen before 
There is a stone
Near the tree
That looks like little tor
I put my hand
Onto the rock
With a thought –
 Good prop for feet
And see some blots 
Of darken blood   
I’m touched by a fear

Someone has a wound 
Or hang oneself 
And blood from wounded neck ?
Suddenly man 
In lighting cloth
With smile began to beck
To come or not… 
Who is this guy ?…
But I took my first step
There is no rain, 
The other trees,   
And men with bowing head

He kneeled and wept
And shout and tremble
And falled on the stone
And sweat with blood
Are falling down
And whispered to someone
“O God If this is possible,
Remove this cup from Me,
But …”

In my ear  a childish voice
“… please give me one Thy tear…”

***

A little room. A little boy
Is sitting on a floor 
And Crucifixion in his hands
And tears and stare above

In atmosphere of a fear
His smile stops  quiet delay
Again queer fire in his eyes
and he begin to pray

“Please give me one Thy tear,
I’ll drink up to the dregs
Than I’ll try to partake
Taste of Thy loneliness
So I will understand
How much you paid for me
And through Thy sacrifice
My life give up to Thee ...”

***

I knew this voice
It was my pray
It really was my dream
But now I get
That all this time
I have betraying Him

Yes, part of me
still want to die
But there no calm for soul
And weight of treason
Weight of sin put ban
To living more

But voice inside began to say
“He died for this sin too
You can accept
That God forgives
And start again to move!”

I’ve looked around
I was alone
I’ve lied in soggy grass
And felt that
something died in me
And nothing have depress

Some piece of dirt
I’ve shaken off
And moved to my home
And felt inside
The oddish fire
That I’m not (more) alone   

It was a walk
Through ancient park
In cool and rainy day
It was the point
When my soul
Began the Gospel way