I Can t Remember What Has Been Before

Celena Costello

I can't remember what has been before,
Don't even recognize you anymore.
Your revelation took me for surprise,
Your hands are made of steel, your heart - of ice.

My life without you was so long ago,
It was before you wanted me to go,
It was before I learned to hide my pain,
It was before you hurt me once again.

The silence grows. This room is getting old,
You stand and stare at me without a word
And fireworks are blazing at the sky,
But neither you will notice them, nor I.

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Hi Celena. Your poem is great - really beautiful!!!!
I never found something in English, as beautiful as it here.
Thanks!!!

Just one thing…
At first line in the second quatrain - I think “So” is unnecessary… I guess, it pushes the line out of the rhythm….

Best Regards…

J a k e 17.10.2002 22:38 • Заявить о нарушении

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Hi there. First of all, thank you for your comment. Hmm... I think you might have a point there... you see, I pronounce a short "without" instead of a long one, and that's why I thought one more syllable in that line was necessary. But you're right - perhaps I should edit it...
I'm looking forward to reading more comments from you.
Celena

Celena Costello 17.10.2002 23:09 Заявить о нарушении

Yes - with short "without" - it's fine!
On my side, i'm looking forward for your new creations, and hope you'll like my, as well.

Jake...
P.S.

J a k e 17.10.2002 23:28 Заявить о нарушении

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