Saying good-bye

To be afraid
To always be afraid
To love again,
To be again betrayed,
Because the memories
Are still so very clear
But she has died,
She’s nowhere to be near.

Still you can cry
And that is what you do,
You feel so bad
But no one can help you,
Not to her fault
She got you to be scared,
And now you’re afraid
Again to care.

To love again
And then be left again
Would be too harsh,
You couldn’t stand the pain,
But still you long for love
That, which you never had
And it’s a shame
That you just can’t have that.

You long for love
But then you get afraid
And getting close
Seems a huge mistake.
You loved her,
She was everything to you,
Your mom, your world,
But then she died and left you.

Your fear now
Is the thing controlling you.
It makes you drive insane
All those around you.
You like a person
But assume you love him,
You grab too hard
But then get scared and dump him.

You’re so afraid
That people won’t accept you
That you do everything except
For which you have to.
You want control,
You need to feel the love,
And not just some
There must be plenty of.

You see the smallest things
Most smallest faults,
You can’t forgive,
They eat you from inside of.
You’re so afraid of loosing
That you loose,
All good that comes your way
Because of the abuse.

Abuse you have,
You put upon yourself,
You put upon your heart,
Your mind, your self.
And then again alone
You sit in tears.
All that has happened
For so many years.

There’s no cure for you,
No way to overcome
All which you feel
Its time to stop be calm.
And take a chance
Believe in someone else
Besides yourself
You hear if not, or else.

The day has come
It’s time to take a chance:
Love someone else,
Take chance in a romance.
Give complete trust
And you will see,
Don’t think its lust
And maybe happy you will be.

1995