Day or night?

what's it like being in the alone?
being in the dark?
just here in this white room..
What's the pain of separateness,
out of touch and feeling of warmth?
Where is the love in this empty
space, caressing my hair and face?
i'm longing for this embrace..
I am waiting to know that you're
near, i need this support - you
are my pillar, my stem, my root,
passion and gem, my tree's trunk
and my bark..
let me out of here, let me breeze ...after dark...
let me open my eyes, need the
air to breeze...open wider
my shoulders, up and off of
my knees...
no ...no there's more.
there's more i must see:
deeper, darker beneath all this
earth and the sea,
heart is heavy with burden
all the pain i have caused
all the pain i have carried
through the years of the winters
plowing my soil deeper, deeper into
my soul.
hard rocks of the ice age are
looking up with their jagged
edges and peaks
can't get myself comfortable
on them - hurting my back.
let them cut through me,
let me fall down in pieces,
pieces of this dark inevitable
aloneness...

it's quieter now. I am content that
they will never understand.
the one who needs to know is i
from flaming burning place of why.
why do we knife instead of hand?
why not to share, instead of brand (horses branding = call it my own)
exhale once, and let it seep through
roots of darkness, deeper...deep..
and let it melt, transcend, transform,
by healing content, changing form,
inhale blue, releasing grey,
or should i keep a bit..- you may...
it is my choice - i own both sides..
who's turn is it? my day's or night's?